Phase Transition, Inc

Empowerment Through Self Awareness

4 Rules for Life

For years I have lived, whenever possible, by four simple rules. My friend and  mentor, Warren Jacobs, M.D., has shown me their wisdom, wisdom he gleaned from Dr. Dean Ornish. I share them with you here, and hope they work the same magic in your life that they have worked in mine.

1. Show Up. Be present and aware of what’s happening in this moment, rather than worried about the future or reliving the past.
2. Be Honest.
3. Be In Touch Your Feelings & the Feelings of Others. Feelings are different from thoughts. They inform or guide thoughts, but they sensations like joy, fear, hopelessness, sorrow, humiliation. If you are clear about your feelings, and the feelings of others an open dialogue can take place.
4. Don’t Be Too Invested in the Outcome. Whenever I am too invested in the outcome, one of the other rules gets forgotten, so I find that when I have my heart set on achieving a goal, it is best if I am also okay if the outcome is not what I was hoping for. When I can imagine both outcomes, and be content with either, I can maintain perspective, and remain in touch, honest, and present.

They are not always easy, but try these rules out the next time you face a situation where you are hoping for a certain outcome, and your partner, friend, sibling or boss is hoping for another. See if it makes things go more smoothly, even if the outcome is not what you were hoping for. Focus on the connection you have with that person, and notice if you respected the connection, and if it is now stronger. I find that stronger connections enrich my life more than gaining the outcome I hoped for every time. See if you agree. Post your feedback, if you like.

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